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Life after Bourdain.

As a nature-loving yet strong and progressive female who types like I’m playing the piano, I often wonder to myself:

What did I gain from learning a second language?

Specifically Mandarin?

I often joke with my friends that the only benefit of being able to converse in English, Mandarin, and Cantonese is that I can apply to work at every Chinatowns around the world with my cart, shouting:

Cha Siu Bao! BBQ PORK BUN! Cha Shao Bao!

We laugh, and the laughter slowly trails off to reveal the sadness that’s left.

Because it’s not entirely a joke, is it?

Especially in a country like Australia.

I can think of an unfair advantage of being able to read Chinese - I have access to the work of Chua Lam 蔡瀾 .

If this is the first time you’ve heard of Chua, I don’t blame you.

Born in Singapore, Chua’s father worked for Shaw Brothers, the biggest film production company in Hong Kong back then. He started writing when he was 14, studied cinema in Japan, and later produced all foreign-made movies by Golden Harvest, usually with that up-and-coming young action star, a bloke call Jacky Chan.

He lived in Spain, Yugoslavia, Thailand, and Australia but always calls Hong Kong his home.

Hailed as one of Hong Kong’s ‘big four’ literature talents, he’s been writing about food since 1983 and since became the authoritative figure. Appearing on TV, travel shows, magazines in Asia.

He was even a judge on the Japanese Iron Chef.

If Anthony Bourdain is Jesus, then Chua is definitely Zeus.

Even the king of Mount Olympus had shortcomings, right?

When you’re in power for too long, people complain. Too much exposure. Too mainstream.

I mean, he was part of show business. So his travel shows are mostly sponsored and endorsed by the big machine.

It’s hard to make a true travel show when your client wants to showcase the up-and-coming movie stars next to the hotel that sponsored the flights.

As a teen, I just thought he’s just saying whatever he was paid to say. Endorsing restaurants, starting his own hawker/dumpling brands. You’ve all seen it, that celebrity with a thumbs up on an instant noodle wrapper.

If my parents like him, I must not.

I remember thinking he doesn’t have any appeal. He looks like a stereotype of what people think a Chinese old man should look like.

But at a time now where even a 5-year-old knows how to show the camera her best side, that daggyness is now endearing.

His writings are more enjoyable than his shows.

Let me translate some for you:

” The main culprit of the death of Chinese culinary is the current infatuation with ‘health’ - afraid of fat, afraid of salt, afraid of sugar. Eating is causing them stress, and that becomes a mental issue. And mental issues affect the body. This modern illness can’t be cured. Once you’re rich, you become obsessed with being thin. The trend is to start a fitness gym and consume diet pills. “

“ People who love food, will not categorise themselves as ‘Easterner’ or ‘Westerner’.
People are people. We all live in the world, on the earth.
People who love food are simple-minded - too busy looking for good food; no time to plot schemes.
Easy to make friends with. “

“ My life motto, written by a minister from Qing Dynasty:

Set high hopes, expect medium reciprocations from relationships, enjoy the blessings of the lower class. “

“ As a city prospers, its hawker food standard goes the other way. A fried egg in Singapore is worse than in Kuala Lumpur, Kuala Lumpur is worse than Penang. The best sunny side up can be found in Thailand. “

That last one got him into trouble. In a casual interview in 2010, he claimed Singaporean food to be tasteless, the people stingy, Kiasu, thin-skinned. Although he did try to reconcile by saying ‘perhaps he’s used to unhealthy food’, ‘ minimum wage in Singapore is higher so they don’t spend enough time cooking’ etc. The lion city’s pitchfork was out looking for blood. His label as a traitor has been immortalised on his Wikipedia page.

Old news? How about this:

3 years ago, on a Chinese TV show, the host asked if he were to possess the power to make a dish disappear, what would it be?

He responded almost immediately: “let it be hot pot.” Followed by the knee into the nose, ”because there is no culture in hot pot cooking. You slice a bunch of raw ingredients and dump them into hot soup.”

To start with, that was a terrible question, just to make headlines.

Then again, he could’ve said something to please the home court - burgers, sashimi, pizza … so many to help beat the chest of big China.

But no, he managed to offend everyone in China, Taiwan, Hong Kong, maybe even Japan, (sukiyaki and shabu-shabu) and France (fondue)?

Even if you disagree ( I’m a pro - I believe COVID and all diseases started from hot pot), you gotta admire the guts.

Know why he’s better than Bourdain?

He’s alive, that’s why.

To be honest, there’re some boomer casual classism and sexism here and there in his books too, but come on, the guy’s 80.

He’s talking, walking, eating, writing, with the same wife, fulfilling his life motto.

Sure, he’s cashing in his fame, making easy money. Being paid for endorsements. Plugging on his YouTube channel.

Who wouldn’t?

You know he doesn’t have to though - he has no kids.

I believe he does what he does because it makes him happy.

And when he goes, it’ll gut me more than Bourdain.

Hi there! If you’re new here, thanks for buying my book.
You can access all the previous newsletters here.

I think my sloppy writing gave a few people a scare last week. I’m not quitting this newsletter, just cutting back on SAC starting November. This newsletter mailing list is my target market sweet spot, I’m going to squeeze you guys dry.

Having said that, I probably will migrate to a paid subscription model like Substack. I just need to work out a pitch to convince you to buy me a coffee every month.

So Melbourne will be ‘open’ by end of October. Maybe I’ll work towards a get-together for my birthday again towards the end of November.

My usual food-centric Instagram is ongoing. Still reminiscing about my 10 years being a wedding photographer here.

Eat well, stay safe.