COVID Anger
Management.

Last week, I was angry at myself for engaging with an online comment, breaking my own rules. On any other day, I’d be fine, but because it was my daughter’s birthday, that one day I wanted to be a good person it affected me. Because a good father should not be embarrassing himself on the internet. And because I couldn’t really be 100% during her birthday, it made me even angrier.

My piece on Santiago’s nama choco went live on Broadsheet.
I’d like to think that gave him more businesses to offset some bad news.

What bad news?

(Can I talk about it Santi? I’ll just touch on it briefly, ok?)

A few weeks ago Santiago had a sold-out ‘high tea at home’ event and due to logistical issues, he had to cancel and refund some orders.

That’s not ideal, but what’s worse is when people started abusing him online. What’s worse is when the abuse reached his wife’s insta as well. What’s worse is when after receiving a refund, customers would still call up the hotel and ask for compensation, demand he gets fired etc.

Here’s another story from a client.

This client, one of the highest acclaimed restaurants in Melbourne makes fancy bento boxes ($80 a pop) every Saturday.

Limited to 10-20 a week, the only way to book it is by phone.

A customer couldn’t get through quick enough and decided to send death threats. What’s worse is he gets the wife to go online and do the same thing.

Over an expensive bento box.

You know what’s worse than pent-up anger?

Pent-up anger with pent-up money.

Everyone’s trying their best here.
Managing a business, pushing products, selling books.
I mean, it’s not like the whole world just woke up with the sole purpose of pissing you off.

My real pent-up anger though, which was repressed since lockdown 2, sounds so pathetic when I type it out:

Crispy chilli oil.

I mean, I’ve seen it lying around friends’ place (in between lockdown 3 and 4) and paid no attention to it.

Until I saw it in Victoria Market recently going for $20.

$20 KANGAROO DOLLARS?

How did we end up paying $20 for chilli oil?

And it’s not just one brand, there’re 4-5 of these around.

If I’m not mistaken, one even had ‘love’ on their ingredient list.

What, the love for profit margin?

I laugh at the reviews because most of them are in the tune of ‘it’s crispy, but not spicy.’ Mild, for everyone.

Okay, so $20 for chilli oil that’s not really spicy?

I don’t know man, if I’m paying nearly a bottle of red wine worth of money for chilli oil, I expect to shit fire.

I get it though, labour.

But before we get into that, what’s wrong with Lao Gan Ma?

I mean, inflation has doubled LGM’s price, but it’s still $3-4 a jar.

I might be overthinking it, but this is like the MSG debacle all over again.

Does anyone in Melbourne remember the chilli scrambled eggs from Three Bags Full? That was Lao Gan Ma. Richmond folks had no issue with it.

Here, we have a proven, consistent, popular product, but the picture of an old grandma is too exotic. Locality and nice typography beats taste and common sense.

And if they’re so local, why aren’t they offering bigger jars? Instead of offering a 3 pack discount ($50, wow!), why not just make a 1kg version and allow us to bulk buy? Let me fill em up like olive oil in organic grocers.

You know what’s the main ingredient in a jar of chili oil?

Oil.

You can check the nutritional label - 70% is fat (which is oil, give or take).
This means out of the $20, $14 goes to oil. And the remaining $6 to garlic, shallots, and chilies. (Don’t forget, love.)

Think about it.

A pack of single-origin coffee is also $20.

My marketing brain is in awe, the Asian grandpa brain is out somewhere having a stroke.

Since turning 5 my daughter’s favourite phrase is ‘my body, my decision.’ I get it, you’re all grown-ups, I can’t tell you what to do.

I can only offer a recipe.

I do have an XO sauce in the book, but dried scallops are expensive yo.

Here’s a really, really simple one to make 2 jars.

The What

300ml of oil (peanut, sunflower, canola .. all good, maybe not olive oil or sesame oil unless you like burnt oil)
50-80g of chilli (dried, birdseye, huajiao, chilli powder, gochugaru…)
8 cloves of garlic
4 shallots / 1 onion
1 knob of ginger

Optional: spring onions, chopped peanuts, sesame seeds, dried shrimps, dried anchovies

The How

1. Roughly pulse garlic, ginger, onion, and the optional stuff. If you like them chunky like chips you can use a mandolin. I personally use pestle and mortar.

2. Chop up / grind the chilies if not using powdered version. Set in a separate wide, heatproof bowl.

3. Heat the oil in a pot until 180°C, fry all the ingredients in Step 1 until golden. (Maybe open the windows too.)

4. You can pour the oil through a sieve, I simply skim them. Cool the ingredients on a wire rack/sieve for 15-20 minutes. (IMPORTANT: This is what makes them crispy.)

5. Return oil to pot.

6. Once it reaches 200°C, carefully, pour/ladle the hot oil into the bowl of chili. They should sizzle and fizzle.

7. Combine with the crispy bits.

8. You can add oyster sauce, fish sauce, soy sauce, sugar, belachan, MSG …

Before I forget (sorry non-Melburnians):

Hakata Gensuke sells their super spicy takana (mustard leaf) toppings for ramen. $8 for 250g. I simply walked into my Carlton shop and bought a bag. My wife adds them to everything.

Look for Kwong Cheong Thye, a Singaporean brand. (They used to stock them at Coles, not sure what’s the deal with COVID. Always available at Asian groceries though.) Their Nasi Lemak sambal is good. The chicken rice chilli is decent. Hoisin sauce delicate. They have crispy chili oil too. All around $5.

Amoy brand and Lee Kum Kee have their own too.

If you’re going to drop $20 though, why not go all out with Lee Kum Kee’s XO sauce? At least you get seafood and some luxe into it.

For a week, I did not know how to end this newsletter.
The world is angry, I’m angry, the internet is angry.

But then a reader came to pick up her book. A doctor, 3rd year in.
A wet evening.
She told me she’s not sure if her job has any meaning.

And I was like, ah shit.

Here we have a real professional dealing with real lives getting burnt out, and I’m here feeling hurt over strangers on the internet.

Like builders protesting a fuss about not having their tea room breaks.

How self-absorbed am I?

Not saying we should abuse each other on the internet.

Just saying, there’re real things to be concerned about.

Everyone’s dealing with their own shit.

After all, what is poo, if not nutrition persevering?

Hi there! If you’re new here, thanks for buying my book.
You can access all the previous newsletters here.

I’m sorry your first newsletter is full of angst.

The next one will be better.

It’s going to be about a movie - The God of Cookery.
Original Cantonese version available on Youtube. English subtitle but dubbed in Mandarin here.

As mentioned I’m slowly transitioning out of SAC and maybe into a paid subscription model.

My pitch to you: to include 1 recipe from my collection of Japanese / Chinese non-mainstream sources, 1 everyday rant, and 1 interview with a chef/friend every month.

Pricing-wise, I’m thinking a coffee a month (haven’t decided if it’s 7-11 coffee or Starbucks Grande though). Seeing that only 50% of my 900 readers are active, and perhaps only 10% of that are willing to drop money, this price model will make sure I get paid 2-3 hours of my time a month.

Not too bad, yea?

Also, I’m scheduled for a proper Clubhouse event on 12 November. The title is “Grandma substitute’ Cookbook. I’ll be chatting with Jessica Williams who also self-published her cookbook about making Turkey for the holidays from an Asian family’s perspective.

Stay safe, eat well.